Stress

A race car when spelled backwards is still a race car. Desserts spelled backwards is stress. Sometimes, a bit of stress is necessary to give us a little nudge, a push to excel, to achieve, to reach higher. However, nobody could tell us when it is suitable to allow stress from which age or to stop by when. Or how much stress is acceptable on a daily or weekly basis. I think in society today, we have many walking zombies. Some how some one may just go berserk anytime anywhere. If nobody kills anyone, then there could be implosions.

State Of Mind

We are constantly in a certain state of mind. When we are negative, we become pessimistic, moody, angry. Few people feel or acknowledge that they can control it and even fewer know that they can change it. If you can master altering your state of mind like a on/off switch, you are a master of you own destiny.

Recently, I was at the car park when the parents of a young boy were having their hands full getting him into the car and he was in a tantrum. Those of us who are parents will understand sometimes these kind of things can get on the nerves. The boy was apparently still in a fouled mood when he saw me. So I waved at him. He waved back. The window was closed and he hid himself by bending forward. When he got up I showed him the thumbs up sign and he responded. Then I gave him the double thumbs up sign and yet again he responded in the same way. My double thumbs up became a double barrel revolver and I pointed and shot at him. He did the same. He was smiling by now. As he was being driven off, I gave him a salute and he saluted me by return.

I am not sure if the parents knew it but I was quite sure the boy was now transformed. This experiment told me something. His state of mind has shifted. We are all like that boy. Walk away for awhile if you must. Take that golf break or that vacation. Have your hiatus. Hibernate if that is your way. Sometimes, take time off just to do nothing. As you please.

Stress Is A Killer

Someone could be a hepatitis B carrier or suffering from diabetes. They could even be aged. But because they are happy nothing happens to them. They remain a hepatitis B carrier and a diabetic or simply aged. How do I know? I have seen these things. Scientists have conducted experiments with animals creating blocked arteries and then placing them in different environment. Those in stressful environment died while the other without stress survived. Some other experiments involved just placing them in a stressful environment and after a prolong period, the organs of such animals begin to fail. A result of stress?

Humans are the same even if we are more intelligent. In fact, our intelligent minds work overtime to frighten ourselves and worry us to death. We have a constant and nagging fear of not achieving certain desired results, losing someone, not living up to expectations. We may live in nice houses and eating the best food but what good is it if we are feeling miserable? Sometimes, I watched documentaries on the poor in some countries and then it caught my attention that many children though not properly nourished and with not much to even wear or play with have such beautiful eyes and smiles. May be the parents don't even know where their next meal is coming from. The father can pick up leftovers from restaurants that the better off disposed after having eaten it halfway to the cheers and joy of his family. They even say a prayer to thank God for a meal. They are happy and carefree.

Health Not Wealth

If our body is in decay what good would a Giorgio Armani suit do? What then is quality of life? Birds of the air are free. Free from care and yet they find their food. Ditto the lilies of the field even if they were to be thrown into the oven tomorrow, they are still taken of today. Quality life means you must have health. Where health flows, wealth grows.

We work too hard and we can ignore our health. We wanted to focus on work and say children can wait but when we wanted children they didn't come. In each step of the way, we suffer more anxiety and more stress. The harder we try the more futile. Nature is not like that. It is calm, relax and beautiful in its time. Everything needs care and restoration in its time. Remove stress and and enter rest.

The real clothes of life are not in our Hugo Boss shirts, Armani suits, Versace glasses or Ferragamo shoes. Nothing wrong with them. The real clothes of life is your health and body because your health and body are the clothes of your soul if you have one. If you don't have one, I cannot argue with you. Lots of people worry over the smallest things and often without realising it. Your mind can become the devil's work shop and it is only when you do not worry and become care free that the devil is rendered helpless. Reject all worries and welcome Mr. Carefree. Fear and worry walk and work hand in hand. Resist fear and worry cannot set in. Reject worries and you are carefree. When you are carefree, the devil cannot operate or dominate in your mind. When this happens, despair will evaporate and health will flow. Be carefree (not careless).

Money Or Your Life?

If you were confronted on a dark alley and the burly assailants say: "Money or your life". What is your response. "Money of course!" and fight them or give them the money and run for your life. This shows us that we are not really in it for the money right? Money is a necessity but it is really health and a quality life that we want but having lots more money can improve somewhat certain qualities in our lives. Remember this so that you will always choose wisely. Each time you are in two minds, ask yourself: "Money or your life?" and you should get the right answer. In the long haul, it is the quality of life and not quality or quantity of possessions that we truly desire.

 

He who sows sparingly will also reap sparingly. He who sows bountifully will also reap bountifully (2 Corinthians 9:6). Farmers will have to sow seeds, allow the seeds to grow, reap and store up their harvest and finally sell their produces in the market. They have to work for if anyone will not work, neither shall he eat. Many people out there are hoping for a windfall, to strike it rich so that by then they thought that they could finally enjoy life. So we push ourselves to attend courses, to get that degree, go for a certain job, or what people say is good in the market, work many years in an organisation, get a promotion, get more so we can have certain salary and earnings and with more money we can then get a quality life. All noble in such pursuits and nothing wrong with that. We should work and do our jobs well but not with extreme stress.

Bird's Lifestyle
 

I can't help but like a bird's lifestyle as they do not have to sow or reap or gather their harvest into barns. They do not labour like humans and do not go through stressful processes in their daily life of the way they take care of things. Their lives are free from care. In other words, we should not wait for a day for quality life to come to us. While working, we must keep a balance and expect a quality life. Do we only have a care free life when our barns are overflowed? Does working harder add to anything as if we are not working hard enough? In the world today, working "hard" is a four letter word especially in Singapore.

I often joked that nobody has ever died from hard work but why take the risk? We have to work smarter and find ways to fulfill work with less stress. Humans usually sing at the Karaoke with a few who may hum sometimes but birds sing all the time! This indicates that they are always happy. Birds are happy because they do not have to live up to other birds' expectations and opinions. During the SARS period, contingency plans were carried up to manage business risk and a friend who was to be temporarily relocated from a posh town office to an obscure corner of the country said that he will be at a place "where birds don't even lay eggs there", so you can imagine the place. So sing like a bird, purr like a cat and bark like a dog if you want but watch your neighbours on the latter.

 

If the quality of life is measured by wealth there is nothing wrong. Wealth is good. Wealth and money can build hospitals and schools but can also buy nuclear weapons. When you gained properly from your wisdom, skill, acumen, foresight, etc. in honesty and with integrity, this is good and honourable but if you are a king who exacted toil and suffering on your people and while they suffer you are enjoying and basking in your glory with ill-gotten gains, this will cause great pains and sufferings to the people and eventually unto you.

 

If you ask a drunkard if he is drunk, he'll say he's not. If you ask a mad man if he is mad, he'll say he's not but when you give him money he'll take it and he'll tell you that I may be mad but I'm not stupid. So are you stressed? No but give me all your money. How do we know we are afraid, worry or stressed? Have you read about some guys who struck it rich in lottery by a few hundred millions and some squandered them all or they fell out with their family and friends or when they became totally changed. There are also times when a promotion can be bad if it completely stress you out. Isn't life meant to be enjoyed? If you were to look at every minute things in the world today, you will feel an awful sense of helplessness and hopelessness as there are full of burden everywhere.

Enjoy your family, your friends, time together, your hobbies, the moments of life. Life is meant to be enjoyed. I know a common phrase in Chinese where people would say...literally translated meant "how many 10 years have one in a life span?" It depends on what you are thinking and your forms of joy and enjoyment. If you do not enjoy, you can become stressed.

We will forever complain about our own situations but when you have lots of friends and and you see around us with open eyes and minds, there are always someone else in a worse condition than you. There was once two patients in a hospital. One was located near a wall while the other was near a window. The guy near the window often peered out and described what he saw to the other fellow - beautiful flowers, greenery, the sea, the beach teeming with people having fun. This lifted the spirit of the fellow near the wall. After sometime, he died so the patient near the wall requested to be shifted near the window. He was looking forward to enjoy the view so often described to him but when he got there all he saw was a block of wall outside the window. Choose what you wish to see in life. It's a perspective.

Perspective

Perspective is our mental view of things. We can be at a same place but we see different things. You may say "Good morning" and someone might reply "what's so good about the morning?" See the morning in its glory.

 

When people see dark clouds they think rain. That is a natural thing but sometimes is does not. You may see lightning and some rumblings but no rain. Perhaps the rain would be short. While golfing, I saw these things when it rained and I refused to let my spirit be dampened. A leaf within a leaf.

And this and after awhile the course was safe and opened.

 

If we forget to enjoy and let stress get the better of us, we become like a decaying leaf. We turn dry and yellow. Our confidence dissipates.

Stress-Busters (CSI)

We must therefore take personal responsibility for our own health and emotions. Nobody can make you angry or frustrated except you. It all boils down to how we deal with each situation. It has to do with how we respond to things. There is a saying "ignorance is bliss". Why? Simply put, if you don't know you cannot respond, get angry, frustrated or worry. So, there you have it. Choose an appropriate response each time. When someone got a bogey, you par. Laugh more and you laugh away your stress. First, learn to laugh at yourself. Humour is extremely important as a stress buster. Deal with the little stuffs. It is the little things that matters. Deal with the small stuffs and the big things will take care of itself and at the end of time, it is really the little things that matter.

Join me in my CSI team. Let us fight the crimes committed by stress together. Let's go in search of all clues and evidence of stress and give it the sucker punch it deserves. We are going to be so good at it that we nip it even before it surfaces. Power to you and a Happy Deepavali!

When you are confident, you can sink your putts like the hole has become a crater.
Are You Stressed?Quality Of LifeSow & Reap