Coming Of Age
I was not sure whether to go to bed early or wait up way late but anyhow I fell asleep. It was the early morning on a day in January back in 1991. It seemed like I have just had 40 winks when I felt someone tugging me. "My water bag has burst" was all my wife said.
I was like: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1KMMDrGRr_Y.
It was 3am. Was I a little nervous, anxious? I drove normally wanting to reach the hospital fast and early and yet not trying to be in a rush. Well, at this ungodly hour, even the devil was asleep even though he does not. The traffic was all clear. I was glad to be at the hospital to check in as the nurses, mid-wives and facilities were all there.
With all these excitement there was no time for breakfast even though the famous and popular Roti John, Mee Siam, Mee Pok and Soursop juice all beckoned near the Gleneagles. My tummy was grinding and growling but labour has just begun. On and off. By now 7am. It was cold in the hospital in the morning especially without food but I can't leave the wife behind at this stage nor do I want to miss the baby's delivery. Hang on there dude, a voice in my head whispered. I was almost hallucinating. Soon it was way past lunch and I might have digested my own stomach and some nearby organs.
The gynecologist was the last to come and first to leave. To them it was like eating breakfast. 3 attempts for normal delivery failed and it was vacuum assisted. It was like the longest day! Finally the baby was out. It was a girl! But her head was a little like a cone due to the vacuum. At 7.3 pounds (3.3 kgs), she was pretty big for a girl I was told. Here she was.
Finally, relieved and happy I got to have my breakfast in the very late afternoon. It was such a joyous occasion to witness the miracle of childbirth. I have always told people that you cannot be the same person after witnessing a childbirth. Great responsibility is now placed in your hands and I believed in the wonders of creation.
One great thing to do is to smell the baby's head. It smells like a freshly baked bread. All babies have this wonderful smell of a newborn life. A fragile baby soon grew into a toddler and then a little child.
A birthday here and a birthday there and the old man gets older.
A few years later, a second gift came from the heavens. This time a nine-pounder who will eventually pee while standing and I missed the whole day's meal till way late into the night as the gynecologist was unable to deliver normally. Not even the vacuum worked nor the forceps which led eventually to Cesarean. Imagine how it was when watching all these "live" until the doctor threw away his rubber gloves and robes and you get to wait outside. It was a tumultuous and incredible experience. A day I will never forget.
Women goes through much pain in childbirth. Can you imagine in the old days, they do not have a gynae to do all these, just midwives. No technology nor better techniques. I believe some of us got our umbilical cords tied wrongly or navel made to look ugly as it was just nip and tuck back then. No wonder some of us are so uptight. What about those early men? Women are not supposed to have pain while giving birth originally.
"I will greatly increase your pains in childbearing; with pain you will give birth to children. Your desire will be for your husband, and he will rule over you." Genesis 3:16
Don't get it wrong guys. Rule meaning you are the head of the household even if she wears the pants.
Here is Agnes Chan with Circle Game:
We captive on the carousel of time. We can't return we can only look behind from where we came....
Sixteen springs and sixteen summers' gone now.....
I want to drag my feet to slow the circle down. My dreams has lost some grandeur coming true. There'll be new dreams maybe better dreams and plenty. (The genius of the song originally written and recorded by Joni Mitchell).
They grew and one day shall leave the nest.
Therefore, a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife and they shall become one flesh. Genesis 2: 24. So that's why people got married. Our children will too.
Ephesians 6: 1-4
Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. “Honor your father and mother”—which is the first commandment with a promise— “so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.”
Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.
We can never know how our children will turn out but we have an unenviable job. We can tell our children what to do and what not to do but at the end of the day, they will do what we do. They will observe how their parents treat their grandparents. How their parents respect authority and how they treat others.
I made a coming of age speech on youtube which I share with you:
The girl is now a woman. No man should bully my daughter or they have to face me. I'm very scary one you know. Very 恐怖 one (like Mr. Brown). Likewise, my son must treat ladies and others with respect. Meanwhile, all fathers should take note that we must show what is acceptable and what is not even when your children are not watching.
Well, the entire story today ends with a twist. The story is all about me. I am now an old young man. No, a young old man. Make that a wiser and better man. It is the coming of age for me. Here's Robbie Williams:
Meanwhile, do not bully old people. Everyone will go this path. You will grow old, lose your teeth, go bald, grow fat, grow weak. Facial muscles collapse, wrinkles accentuate, gravity pulls. Old people can be very powerful as they will pray more often and believe more fervently. Don't mess with them. I show you:
"From there Elisha went up to Bethel. As he was walking along the road, some boys came out of the town and jeered at him. “Get out of here, baldy!” they said. “Get out of here, baldy!” He turned around, looked at them and called down a curse on them in the name of the LORD. Then two bears came out of the woods and mauled forty-two of the boys." 2 Kings 2: 23-24
As you know, you can't outrun a bear as they can go 40mph, faster than an Olympic sprinter. Just play dead. You don't need to outrun the bears, just outrun the other boys. The best thing is not to bully old men. Haha.
Just kidding! The Almighty don't do these things. We have such a thing called Grace! Grace is here, we don't need bears. There was this guy running away from a grizzly big brown bear and he knew it was hopeless as he came to a dead end so he prayed: "God, please make this bear more human". Suddenly, the bear stopped running and stood up walking like a man, knelt down and prayed: "Dear God, thank you for the meal you have just given me".
As I walk a new chapter in life, the journey continues into the next lap. The show must go on even if the spirit is willing but the flesh is not some times. I hope you will look back in life's journey and have many wonderful memories because that's all you have and all you need - the more the merrier as we do not know if or when we lose them. To do so, you will have to create them. I wish you an abundance! That's the Times of Your Life. Here's Paul Anka:
Come to think about it, I feel old for a 38 year old. Must have been mixing with too many old people. Release the bears!!
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