Honour Thy Father (& Mother)

I have just been back from an exhausting but yet rewarding family trip. It didn't helped that I was also away the week before. That left me with no time at all to pen an article for all fathers on this planet but it is better late than never. When I found what little time I had at this ungodly hour before I hit the sack, I also found that seven new countries have reached my blog making it 78 countries in total.

The latest being Austria, Guyana (near Venezuela), Iceland, Kenya, Macedonia, Mexico and Iceland. Hey, thanks for visiting and the many others. The other countries are also increasing in their numbers. I want you to warm up by listening to "Papa" (Paul Anka) - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uMMlcu0cD50 ... "your children live through you and they'll grow and leave you too". Crank up some hobbies and hook up with friends to keep busy mates.

Everybody can treat dad to dinner on Father's Day, it is a noble act and is symbolic but beyond that, it is how you treat daddy everyday and how much you love him that really counts. Fathers are different from mothers. Perhaps mothers sacrifice more (well, at least in most cases) but fathers tend to suffer more in some aspects.

Women tend to talk things out while fathers are usually the strong and silent type and so they suffer in silent and he has been conditioned from young that crying is for sissies so he tends to hold back tears and his tears would find another outlet maybe through his nose and then his nose got jammed and instead of crying he goes out for a beer to "cry a thousand rivers" - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lt6IPagpC9A. 

A good father will "always be there for you" no matter what happens. Being a father is no bed of roses and while you sleep on bed of roses your father could be sleeping on a bed of nails: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NvR60Wg9R7Q. That is the heart of a true father. He shall never leave nor forsake you. The love is unconditional. Hebrews 13:5 says: "Let your conduct be without covetousness; be content with such things as you have. For He Himself has said "I will never leave you nor forsake you".

Dads tend to act like they are super cool and largely unaffected but deep down inside they will sometimes also worry and panic - like a swan so graceful above the water but below the water peddling like mad. When the children comes home late, the father would sit in the living room watching TV or reading the newspapers but they are actually waiting for you to come home safely. They would not tell you that. Perhaps it's a man thing. If any guys out there mistreats their daughters, better watch out as the fathers would love to bash you up. Yet, fathers must remember that other women are other people's daughters as well, so do not do things that would get you bashed up.

Just like Madonna singing Papa Don't Preach: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R5nE1J0lKpY. I heard Madonna is opening a restaurant at Serangoon Road's Little India and calling it Papadom Preach. Truth is that children will never understand the heart of parents until they themselves become parents. Some may not even do so after they become parents. Those who do, better still at a younger age shall have a heart of gold. They will think we give too many instructions. So, papa don't preach but live a life of example as leadership by example is one of the most powerful leadership traits.

Many of our fathers made huge sacrifices for their children since we were young. Many of today's fathers are still doing the same. I hope children young and old recognize and appreciate that and take time to reflect on it. It is not the gifts they receive from you that gives meaning to their lives but it is the time you take to spend with them and how you grow up to be fine young men and ladies with honour that is the true reward.

Every good father knows how to give good things to their children but the greatest gift a father can give to their children is by being a living example on how to live your life. You can tell your children what to do but children will truly learn by watching, learning and following what their parents do and how you treat others. Proverbs 10:1 says: "A wise son brings joy to his father but a foolish son brings grief to his mother". "Listen, my son, to your father's instruction and do not forsake your mother's teaching. They will be a garland to grace your head and a chain to adorn your neck" - Proverbs 1: 8-9.

When you shout at your parents, they will one day shout at you. I am sure for many of us, fathers are like our heroes as they taught us many things in life, For fathers have come and lived so that you can have a better life. Please see my previous tribute to all fathers from this link: http://gforce-guru.blogspot.com/2010/06/tribute-to-fathers.html.

The family unit is a very important one that is why God created one as family units are the fabric of a society and nation and fathers are appointed by God as the "Head of the Household" in a family even if you do not agree with that or the head of the household seems dumb at times or even often times they are blur or hopeless.

In fact, many men today do not have the slightest clue how to be a good father or what being a father entails. Some of us are morons but at the other end of the spectrum there are great fathers. So there is hope! If your earthly father can give you so much, what about the Heavenly Father? On Father's Day, honour should be given to God too. Since I became a father, when I watched a movie or read the news about some children without a father or fathers who abused their children, tears would well up in my eyes as I feel such a sense of great injustice to the point of being inconsolable for awhile. I mean I already felt like that when I was not a father. Therefore, it is an honour to be a father and I shall uphold the name of fatherhood for all man. Proverbs 20: 7 - "A righteous man leads a blameless life; blessed are his children after him".

Fathers of the world must unite, share and learn from one another good practices just like one would do in business, It is easy to call someone papa but to be called papa it will be for a lifetime of struggles and sacrifices. Fathers can never replace mothers as the world will come to an end without mothers but fathers are here to lead in a different sphere. If the mother is like a driver then the father is the putter.

Your responsibilities as a father is not confined to helping babies, swiping buttocks with wet tissues and everything involved in their growing up. More important than that would be what kind of example you give to your children, what moral values you impart to them. Teach your sons to be gentlemen and daughters to be fine ladies. It is about a legacy. What legacy would you leave them? Your legacy being here as a father has the power to influence what kind of future generations after you would be like. If you have been just providing for the family, ask yourself if it is good enough. Your children especially the younger ones even if they are teenagers need your time. This is something that money cannot buy. You will not know it or count the costs of it now but when it hit you suddenly one day it may be too late.

Children of the world must respect and love your parents. Give your due respect to the old man and old lady in the house - they deserve it even if they have less education than you. Some of us may have dads who has gone on to a better place but I am sure you have learned many things from them. If you have a dad who is a dud then your job is not to continue in his veins. You shall depart from the wrong ways. You have to take charge and take responsibility and begin by being your own man for you too shall one day become a father. How would you want your children to be like? It will be how you are like. What kind of father are you? Are you prepared and ready? Do note that parents are often not happy when their children are not happy.

In this day and age, people can celebrate everything and anything. What is Father's Day? For how should you remember dad? In our Asian society, we grew up differently from our friends in the West. It may be odd when you go up to dad and say "Papa, I love you!" Try to say that in any language. Your dad may even think that you are mad or wanted money! If you can't, take heart. Actions speak louder than words. Honour thy father in your own special way. To all papas, Daddy's Home! - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IJJuYpx0w2Q.

Fathers are awesome my friends!! Why? Mothers may see you eating satay and fried noodles just once and go: "Aiyoh why are you eating satay and fried noodles everyday?" or she may inspect your windows and I am not talking Microsoft Windows please and tell you how dirty they are when you haven't even had time to notice your window is there. The last time such a thing happened was when you were in the army and the corporal did that to you.

Fathers will never inspect your windows. Ain't that awesome?! Fathers do not need to preach or teach too much. It should be like our education system's aim - less teaching more learning. But do not provoke your children too. Rely on logic and common sense and never say "because I am your father and I say so." Look what happened to Darth Vader and Luke Skywalker when he said "wah si lim lau peh" - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-tbJ4HavnKE. And children need not be perfect for their dad just like their dad wasn't perfect for them. Just share lots of love!

Tips for moron dads: create free-time for family bonding, be friends not just parents, instill values and as much as possible make time for dinner together every night, put the family first. Moms, if you are behind the pecking order, time to catch up! 

Finally, your dad will not be here forever and for that your mum too. Take a moment or two to see how they do. For every child will grow up to become a father or mother too. What child you are will help you be that father too. I give you a song from Filipino Freddie Aguilar aptly called "Anak" or "Child" - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oklvyDqCem8. May God bless all the fathers and put some common sense in them to lead their respective family and household. Children and that includes adult children need to know that what a father wish for his children is simply good health, happiness and for them to be honourable.

Exodus 20:12 - "Honour thy father and thy mother so that you may live long..."